30 Days To Happy

By Guest Blogger Shanda Norton

It could all be so simple as waking up every morning happy and getting right back to happy when you find yourself in a funk right??? If it’s that simple for you then show yourself and give me secret ingredient to constant happiness. You may be wondering why I’m making it such a big deal I’m sure. I mean we all have unhappy moments and even bad days so I can cease the dramatics. Well it’s not that simple for me OK! No, I’m not manic depressive and no I’m not on medication although sometimes I think I should be. However, a bad moment turned into a bad day, a bad day turned into a bad week, and a bad week turned into a bad month. Let me not forget to mention that during this same bad month I was promoted with a big jump in pay, received a prestigious award from my company, my son received academic accolades, and I coached a vibrant group of cheerleaders. I had my health, a sound mind, and showed up for people in my life that needed me without batting an eye. All the while I was not happy at all…can you believe that? It’s true and this funk was draining me as I allowed one aspect of my life to spill over into my overall being.

I cried every single day for over a month, and on Monday, April 1st I realized happiness is not natural. I decided I had to choose to find my way back to happiness no matter what happened every day. In true millennial fashion I took to Facebook with a post and before you knew I started a group called 30 Days to Happy with over 100 members. We all say misery loves company, but I didn’t invite anyone to my misery I suffered in silence but invited everyone to my journey back to happy. The universe was conspiring against me because little did I know April was Self-Love month. Each day I would post a motivational quote and start the day with gratitude for three things I was thankful for. Before you knew it, people began to follow my lead and post inside the closed group every morning. The five steps were gratitude, reflection, recognition, physical wellness, and mental wellness. We posted meditation techniques, 15-minute cardio workouts, struggles, wins, etc.       

Now you would think it was all unicorns and fairy dust from there and I was the happy poster child. Problem solved Shanda, you are happy and you have these people looking to you for inspiration. Well No, Nope, Nah…it was not that simple and I hate to disappoint you. Remember I said happiness is not natural it is a choice. There were days it took everything in me to come up with three things I was thankful for. There days I felt like I was back at March 31st deep inside my funk and balled up in tears. The beauty of this harsh reality was after I would cry it out, I would tell myself to choose happiness. I would begin to find it easier to bounce back and not let a bad moment or situation ruin my energy for the day. There were days where when I felt my anxiety rising that I made a conscious decision to meditate and self sooth. Since misery doesn’t love company, I used my village to feed off their vibe. I would go into the group and read everyone else’s posts to put things perspective.

The 30 Days to Happy journey has ended as of today but the 365 Days to Happy journey has begun for me. I learned from this that if I choose to find my happy place in the middle of chaos, I’m not being selfish. Eliminating people, places, things, and habits that obstruct my journey is a necessary task daily. Will I still have bad days? Of course, I will and maybe even bad weeks but what I will not do is forget that choosing happiness is my responsibility. Self-awareness is the first step to true self-love and self-care. Being honest with myself about things that trigger me and recognizing that I’m slipping before I fall is all on ME. I’m so ready to keep this up and I promise when you realize it’s a choice and stop waiting for it to come naturally you will experience the real essence of happiness.